In 2012 I went through a difficult divorce. My parents had rescued me. While I thought moving in with them was just to get back on my feet, I quickly found out that I was called upon to do something else. I was a caregiver for my father, who had Lyme disease. This lasted 10 years until on September 13th at 2:30pm, he transitioned.
To give a little history of what I was involved in for 10 years, I worked part time and adjunct in education. For much of that I was unemployed. I have also trained a border collie (who is now 5 years old)...more on that in a future post. During my tenure as a caregiver, I completed my second masters (in Teaching English to Speakers of Other Languages), a doctorate in Education in Instructional Technology and Distance Education, a UX (User Experience) /UI (User Interface) bootcamp. I spent 3 years job searching, pivoting, jumping through hoops to find employment, only to be rejected and rejected and rejected.... Little did I know, I was chasing the wrong path.
During this time, I started working with a vet who out of her generosity, started working with me to help train my now 5-year old border collie, Ben. What I gained, I was not expecting. I learned more about working with sheep, about myself, why I was so unhappy, and ways to work on my mental health.
This vet, also recommended resources that might help. She recommended, Echert Tolle's New Earth and Danette May 's Podcast and resources. I began reading all I could from her resources and noticed I was feeling more like myself. I still had much more to learn from this vet and what was to come.
While I thought I had been preparing for the end of this journey, I clearly was not prepared for what came next and what would become my greater purpose.
When my dad transitioned, I asked two questions of myself:
Who am I?
So, I decided to take a long extended break...to grieve.... and to figure out who I am...and where I need to be. I needed to have an income but didn't want to chase a field where I wasn't supposed to be. I thought being in person in a part-time job was good place to start. A friend told me that a local pet store was hiring for dog groomers. So, I went in there, filled in an application (which I had to explain that my experience was not relatable in the application). I returned several times (as a customer) where not once did they acknowledge my application. In the meantime, I was also a customer of a local wine store that was just sold to two friends. So, during one of their tastings, I told them my dad passed away and I was looking for something that was fun, in person, and where I could learn something. I would return every week to check on where things were. (I never filled out an application). I have been working there for a month...it isn't much in terms of income, but it is something...and a place where I can feel happy.
While dog training, working at a local wine store, reading, etc., my mom told me about this webinar on Neurosculpting. For the past few weeks I have been going through the courses and is making a difference...I am not the panicky self I was before. Future posts will include more information on that.